Today's News

Today was an ordinary Sunday afternoon until my cell phone rang.... and then I heard the news. The lead pastor of the church I was on staff at 2 years ago in Canton, Georgia admitted to having an affair and resigned. Then, I started receiving emails, Tweets, text messages, etc. The overwhelming response from people was "sorry that you were right". I didn't want to post anything tonight and I didn't really want to address this just yet, but with the amount of response being received I felt it was time.

I am sorry for those involved in this situation. There are no winners here. Bottom line is it stinks. No, I am not surprised by the news from Canton in the least. I was not on staff there very long - only 6 months and from those that know me know that speaks for itself. Truly, serving there was the worst experience that I have had in my life. I will not go into the details here but part of the story made it into the book The Mad Church Disease.

On the flip side, I have been on the other side of this type of experience as well. About 3 years ago, a pastor that I had a great deal of respect for (and served on his staff) admitted to an affair that spanned many years. I was devastated and crushed. I will never forget those days. It truly stunk. Soon after the news broke, other people began to share their stories of abuse at the hands of this pastor. Their stories were shared not to kick dirt on this pastor but for the first time many people felt the freedom to share their story. I learned that this person I respected had some serious issues to deal with and had abused many people (it went way beyond the affair). How could this happen, I thought? How could this person lead a church and be doing all of these horrible things on the side?

I have learned alot since then. I have met many pastors who have left the ministry after having affairs. Also, I have met people who have been abused by cults and churches. I have witnessed alot of crap (there is a better four letter word but I will pass on using it here). Bottom line is we all struggle. We all struggle with loving God and truly accepting that He loves us as we are. That He is enough to fill every bit of us. We try to fill ourselves our own way, trying to numb the pain of life that we are feeling. We ALL do it in some form of another because we are all human. Some of us fill ourselves with more socially acceptable sin like overeating, watching television. surfing the Internet for 20 hours a day and yet others find solace in non acceptable forms such as porn and yes even affairs. The root cause is all the same - trying to fill some pain or void in our lives. At some point in our lives, we have the opportunity to face not only the pain, but the source of the pain as well. We have an opportunity to allow God to work on healing our heart and experience the freedom of Christ.

What am I trying to say? At this moment, many are hurting. I encourage you to experience and face that pain. Talk about it, express it. Don't just hide it and pray about it. Focus on what is hurting and bring that to God. Express your pain and sorrow to Him. I am not saying that He will take it away tomorrow and that the birds will be singing around your window and life will be beautiful. What I am saying is that you are not alone and that God is willing to walk through this with you if you let Him. It beats the alternative of walking through such a journey alone - or of trying to numb this pain being felt through other vices. This is not something that can be done alone, but something that must be done in community (as I am learning the hard way - just ask Chris Roe). Sometimes it involves a counselor and other times just an honest group of real people who are wiling to walk with us in the journey of life. It may not feel like it today but God does care about you and what you are going through - He is still there.